In order to get my permanent visa to stay in Germany, I have to send my landlord the following form.
Owner's Confirmation of Sufficient Living Space for Foreign Renters/Subletters
Family Name, Name
House number and Floor of Apartment
To whom it may concern,
before a visa can be issued, the Ausländerbehörde (Foreigners' Office) must approve your renter's living arrangements.
Requirements for the quality of construction for the apartment are described in Article 3, Section 2 of the Wohnungaufsichtsgesetzes of July 24, 1974.
Therefore, we require that you answer the following questions.
Please assist your renter by accurately filling out the form. This will accelerate the processing of the renter's request for a residence visa. Thank you for your cooperation.
1. Has a leasing agreement beens signed with the foreigner? (yes/no)
2. The monthly rental fee, including housing costs, is €_
3. Is the foreigner's apartment self-contained? (yes/no)
4. Are there multiple families in the apartment? (yes/no) If yes, how many? _
5. How many and what type(s) of rooms are there in the foreigner's apartment? _
6. How man square meters are there in the apartment?
7. How many people live in the apartment?
⁃ Children under 6 Children over 6 Adults _
8. I have been informed that members of the foreigner's family, consisting of adults and children, will be moving into the apartment and have agreed to this.
Should the Foreigner's Office doubt the veracity of these statements, it reserves the right to visit and examine the premises.
Name of Foreigner
Address, Telephone
_
Of course, I'm sure it's all for my own protection. But I'm wondering how many landlords just say screw it, it's not worth having the government come in and make sure little mister Ausländer is getting enough fresh air and sunlight.
Here's a scan of the scary, rakishly yellow document.
The newer Apple laptops, the MacBooks, have a built-in sudden motion sensor that will tell them if they've fallen off a table, for example. This allows them to park their hard drives before they hit the ground, which avoids some types of hard-drive damage.
But I'm not sure Apple was counting on people having so much fun with these things.
Exhibit A: The MacSabre
Using your Mac’s sudden motion sensor, this software turns your computer into a Jedi weapon almost worthy of taking on the real thing by making authentic lightsaber sound effects. It senses speed for the lightsaber movement sounds and acceleration for different levels of striking sounds.
Exhibit B: iAlertU
iAlertU is a car alarm system for your MacBook computer. iAlertU uses the built in motion sensor device to detect movement of your MacBook and triggers an audible and visual alarm. The alarm can also be triggered by keyboard and mouse/trackpad movement.
Exhibit C: Smackbook Pro
Turns out, the laptop has a built-in motion sensor. Nominally, it's there to protect the internal hard drive. The basic idea is this: If the accelerometer suddenly notices that the gravitational pull of earth is no longer present, the most likely explanation is that the laptop, sensor and all, is currently accelerating at 9.81 m/s² towards said earth. In that case, it will (wisely) try to turn the hard drive off in preparation for impact. It can, however, also be used in situations not involving lobbing the laptop across the room, fun though that may be.
Cool cool cool. Unfortunately, my Powerbook is old, unadorned with such wonderful gadgets.
The uses for iPods just keeps on growing:
With the Nike+ footwear connected to iPod nano through the Nike+iPod Sport Kit, information on time, distance, calories burned and pace is stored on iPod and displayed on the screen; real-time audible feedback also is provided through headphones.
Hmmm. Unfortunately, I get the feeling Creative's will be getting a patent on this technology sometime around 2015.
Man, check out the site for this. If I was an excercisin' man, I'd actually like to try that out. Of course, paying $400 for a pair of shoes, not to mention $300 for an iPod Nano actually costs more than getting liposuction, so I'll wait.
If you're as vehemently anti-Socialist, read: libertarian, as I am, you've probably written Europe off. Europe is a socialist playground, unfortunately. Germany, France, England, and a few other countries are officially stuck in the tar, and have sadly already started their sad, slow, hopeless slide into the pits of 8th grade history class. It's all over but the archaeology at this point. But life goes on, and there will be a resurrection. If Europe is to live on, it must decide what defines Europe.
If you ask a European, he'll tell you that what defines a European nation is the 'nation' itself, which means, in the modern context, the race that inhabits it. Germans are Germans owing to either their pale skin, or, in the case of the rassige Germans, their family's documentable lineage. The French are exactly the same. There's a defined border between racially indigenous Europeans, and the dreaded Einwanderer, or immigrants. I could probably pass as a German, despite my bushy red sideburns. I understand the social requirements. I understand them at least enough to know how much they chafe at individualism, and I avoid breaking said requirements in exasperating ways. Once I get rid of my outrageous American accent, my pale skin and decorum would suitably qualify me as a German.
You see, Socialism dooms the Europeans. Socialism is itself an obvious lie. I'll give you an example. It's often said that Europeans are tightwads, but that's not exactly the truth. To understand them, you have to look no further than their tipping system. When drink in a German bar, for example, the tip is built into the price of the drinks. And it's not a stingy tip, either: It's 18%. This means, obviously, that no matter how good the service is, you're tipping them very well for a job not yet done. The joke is, it's an unspoken rule that you ignore the built-in tip, and give the waiter a little bit extra as trinkgeld, or 'drinking money'. I usually rebel at this point. I give at least 10% tip to whomever serves me, because I understand that the establishment keeps the 18% for itself. Now, never mind the fact that the average waiter in Germany gets paid a fortune in comparison to a waiter in the U.S. (basically, they actually get a real paycheck, and health insurance), and they can only hardly be fired, owing to the whole worker's paradise thing. Imagine being a waiter where it didn't matter how good you did your job, you'd still make rent and you couldn't be fired! How hard would you actually work? And for what purpose?
That is Socialism. I spent an evening talking with The Snowfrog, an ex-East German. We talked about an astounding array of subjects, as we usually do when we've had enough to drink. The Socialist politicians in Germany prey upon the good intentions of Germans. They practice extravagant charity with money that doesn't belong to them, and humility through the debasement of hard-working people that have no choice in the matter. All the arguments in European politics revolve around the getting of money, as all politics do, without the common courtesy of speaking directly with those to whom the money belongs!
European politics consists of morality brokers, who promise to use your money for moral purposes that you could only dream of being good enough for fulfilling yourself. They will force you, under threat of imprisonment, to be charitable and loving of your fellow man.
And your fellow man will be ungrateful, and will spit upon you, given the opportunity. At least when you leave a good tip, someone should say 'thank you'.
